My understanding of the terms is that `recato` means something that has much more to do with `decencia` than to 'modestia`. I use them more or les this way: 

`Modestia` is indeed _modesty_. I use to show the humility of somebody about skills or good deeds. It is not shyness and I consider it a good thing (not being eager to brag or show off), but of course other might think that humility might have to do more with somebody not daring to speak for himself or herself and saying that people who are modest are so because they are just shy or `pudorosos`.

'Decencia' is also almost self-explanatory. Do what is considerer decent or appropriate (which might be up to the society to decide).

`Recato` would be to apply "decency" to your dress code or behavior. If I hear

> Vestía recatadamente

I imagine a woman who is trying not to show much of her body (almost as if she was dressing like my grandmother would had 70 years ago: skirt under the knees, not showing the neckline...). Maybe that could be where `pudor` comes across too. I guess that you can apply "recato" to behavior too (`comportarse con recato`) but the inflections is that is more about following social convention that about modesty, shyness or even `pudor`. And that acceptance of the social rules is "decency". 

If somebody 

> Se comporta con recato

might imply that he is not speaking out of time, doing anything inappropriate, etc.